​ Letting go 😢 ​

[iDesign]

Have you ever had trouble saying goodbye to a palm?

Today we finally said goodbye to one of our three "Old Men" palms, which had struggled mightily since we got it in March 2022. Kindly procured by @aztropic, it was our craziest palm purchase. My husband drove from San Diego to Arizona to pickup three of them. Ok, technically it was for our daughter to "spend time with her cousins" - but the palm opportunity was the underlying driver. We had always wanted a trio of Old Men and had purchased three small ones locally (the tiny ones visible in the photo below)... but the opportunity to snag three huge ones seemed too good to pass up, since this palm is quite rare for CA, and they're extremely slow-growing here (from what I've heard).

One of the palms (on the right in the above photo) was our "Golden Boy" and seemed pretty healthy from the get-go. The second (on the left) had been "on watch" since we've gotten it, but has seen slow yet steady improvements. But the third went into immediate decline soon after purchase, and Scott attempted to resuscitate it with a delicate spear surgery (to remove the decay). And it seemed to be pulling through! The spear started growing again, and we continued its care with periodic peroxide treatments. Then in September there was a freak heat wave... and the next time I looked at it, the new spear had "fried". It never regrew (despite continued treatments), and now a FULL YEAR after it likely died, we're finally ready to let it go.

I originally took the above photo as a joke, but it was surprisingly therapeutic for me. It was a cool palm, and we gave it our best try. Though we'll at times mourn the "trio" we had originally planned, we take great comfort in the palms that have made it thus far. The sad fact is that this entire shipment of old men palms was ill-fated from the get-go, and my understanding is that almost every palm in that group has sadly perished (prevailing theory is that they might have endured a freeze during their late winter/ early spring trip from FL to AZ).  The fact that I have not one but TWO survivors from that troubled group of palms should be celebrated. But today I can't help but feel a little sad as I say goodbye to my little palm buddy.

Feel free to share your own "eulogies" to a beloved palm here.
Or a story of a palm you kept MUCH longer than you should have (hoping for a miracle recovery).

[Kim]

My condolences. During my early years of planting palms in California, yes, there were some sad farewells. But none more so than my beloved Carpoxylon that never made it through a single year. Perhaps if I'd had more experience and knowledge back then, it might have lived a bit longer. On the bright side, that was part of what drove me to purchase a house on an acre of rainforest in Hawaii. Now I have a number of mature Carpoxylon macrospermum that give me great delight. 

However, one loses palms, even in a perfect climate. I have lost 4 Clinostigma samoense (warburghii), very painful losses, as they were mature cornerstones of my garden design. Another pending loss weighs so heavily on me I can't bear to mention the name of the palm. 💔 Loss has taught me that nothing lives forever, and daily gratitude and appreciation for what we have is the best tonic. ☯️

And then of course, one can fill the empty space with something new and untested. 😉

[Darold Petty]

All things must pass, including me and my garden !

[flplantguy]

I try to buy them in groups due to this. And triples look nice for most species except big ones.  My three seedlings for a latania are down to two but that was death due to animal theft.  I'm glad I have the others (saved by the sinker!) and can focus on that, because it can be very maddening to lose a prized plant-or collection (I try not to think about that experience).  Keeping the accomplishment you did in mind helps too like you said. Those remaining old men look much happier than the name would imply lol.  Add some shades and some braids and you have two party guests!

[iDesign]

  On 8/23/2023 at 5:16 PM, flplantguy said:

Add some shades and some braids and you have two party guests!

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Seriously considering putting a table with chess board between them (and yes, sunglasses at times). 😎♟️😎

[flplantguy]

  On 8/23/2023 at 6:58 PM, iDesign said:

Seriously considering putting a table with chess board between them (and yes, sunglasses at times). 😎♟️😎

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I would be thrilled to see this!  I may have to do that myself some day lol.

[Patrick]

I had a Livistona that I had to cut down a few years back. several feet of clear trunk. It sucked. Nice palm, but too much liability! That was the same year I cut down a queen as well that had been terminally damaged by my sabotaging (now ex) neighbors. Bummer. I feel ya!

[kinzyjr]

The toughest palms I had to let go of were the Jamaican Tall coconuts I lost because pool water got into their planting beds.

[DoomsDave]

Ouch @iDesign sorry to hear! Been there done that with Old Man palms, which croaked.

The HARDEST thing to do is murder something magnificent because it's just too big (and magnificent) for its or your own good.

Had to do that with Butch the Roystonea a bit ago, ouch.

[DoomsDave]

  On 8/23/2023 at 6:58 PM, iDesign said:

Seriously considering putting a table with chess board between them (and yes, sunglasses at times). 😎♟️😎

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Maybe add sandals, miniature bongos and a sign that says "Like Swing Dad!" 🥸

[Darold Petty]

I had the tallest Rhopalostylis palms in northern California, with about 24 feet of wood trunk below the crownshaft.   For years I tied up the fronds using a 28 foot extension ladder to prevent the uncontrolled frond falling, which would smash any smaller plants beneath.  When this ladder was no longer sufficient I paid a tree service $2000 to remove them ! 

[Patrick]

  On 8/24/2023 at 1:25 AM, Darold Petty said:

I had the tallest Rhopalostylis palms in northern California, with about 24 feet of wood trunk below the crownshaft.   For years I tied up the fronds using a 28 foot extension ladder to prevent the uncontrolled frond falling, which would smash any smaller plants beneath.  When this ladder was no longer sufficient I paid a tree service $2000 to remove them ! 

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https://youtu.be/b07Z_qfchFk?si=FI-fITupiHF6PFcE

 

[happypalms]

  On 8/23/2023 at 7:49 AM, iDesign said:

Have you ever had trouble saying goodbye to a palm?

Today we finally said goodbye to one of our three "Old Men" palms, which had struggled mightily since we got it in March 2022. Kindly procured by @aztropic, it was our craziest palm purchase. My husband drove from San Diego to Arizona to pickup three of them. Ok, technically it was for our daughter to "spend time with her cousins" - but the palm opportunity was the underlying driver. We had always wanted a trio of Old Men and had purchased three small ones locally (the tiny ones visible in the photo below)... but the opportunity to snag three huge ones seemed too good to pass up, since this palm is quite rare for CA, and they're extremely slow-growing here (from what I've heard).

One of the palms (on the right in the above photo) was our "Golden Boy" and seemed pretty healthy from the get-go. The second (on the left) had been "on watch" since we've gotten it, but has seen slow yet steady improvements. But the third went into immediate decline soon after purchase, and Scott attempted to resuscitate it with a delicate spear surgery (to remove the decay). And it seemed to be pulling through! The spear started growing again, and we continued its care with periodic peroxide treatments. Then in September there was a freak heat wave... and the next time I looked at it, the new spear had "fried". It never regrew (despite continued treatments), and now a FULL YEAR after it likely died, we're finally ready to let it go.

I originally took the above photo as a joke, but it was surprisingly therapeutic for me. It was a cool palm, and we gave it our best try. Though we'll at times mourn the "trio" we had originally planned, we take great comfort in the palms that have made it thus far. The sad fact is that this entire shipment of old men palms was ill-fated from the get-go, and my understanding is that almost every palm in that group has sadly perished (prevailing theory is that they might have endured a freeze during their late winter/ early spring trip from FL to AZ).  The fact that I have not one but TWO survivors from that troubled group of palms should be celebrated. But today I can't help but feel a little sad as I say goodbye to my little palm buddy.

Feel free to share your own "eulogies" to a beloved palm here.
Or a story of a palm you kept MUCH longer than you should have (hoping for a miracle recovery).

Expand  

I like to purchase my palms in groups of 3 if I can that way I have something to gauge against in the growth habits 

[The Palm Nut]

  On 8/23/2023 at 9:49 PM, kinzyjr said:

The toughest palms I had to let go of were the Jamaican Tall coconuts I lost because pool water got into their planting beds.

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I cut down 3 coconuts, very hard to do, but I still have 3 others and they are in better positions in the garden. The three stumps on the lower right.

[kinzyjr]

  On 8/27/2023 at 11:10 PM, The Palm Nut said:

I cut down 3 coconuts, very hard to do, but I still have 3 others and they are in better positions in the garden. The three stumps on the lower right.

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It was a tear-jerker. 😢  Tough to dig when you're sad, but at least the replacements were only a phone call away.

[BS Man about Palms]

Old thread, but I feel your pain.. and will try again of course.

 

 

[iDesign]

  On 8/27/2023 at 11:57 PM, BS Man about Palms said:

Old thread, but I feel your pain.. and will try again of course.

 

 

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Wow, the "eulogy" on page 2 is a tear-jerker indeed. Partial excerpt (thought the entire thing was well-written):

On Jun 21, 2010 Miss Kentiopsis piersoniorum of Oceanside succumbed to her illness after a year of fighting. She had fought valiantly even trying to "take her life in a new direction... The family asks that you send Kentiopsis piersoniorum seeds or seedlings in lieu of flowers."

We laugh... but it legit feels therapeutic to take a moment to pay tribute to the fallen. Sounds like it still stings a bit 13 years later. 😢

[Josh-O]

  On 8/23/2023 at 5:08 PM, Darold Petty said:

All things must pass, including me and my garden !

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Sooo true

[happypalms]

  On 8/27/2023 at 11:10 PM, The Palm Nut said:

I cut down 3 coconuts, very hard to do, but I still have 3 others and they are in better positions in the garden. The three stumps on the lower right.

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Forget the coconut 🥥 love the Areca 

[Phoenikakias]

Two Parajubaea losses have been most painful. A bigger tvt, which according to Californian standards was still small, but just not available in the local market and transport costs fron another European country not affordable! So an irreplacable loss. The other Parajubaea was a zunkha grown from seed, which was so pure , that one could see clearly the difference from tvm. 

I mean, both specimens did not seem to struggle in my climate. They looked perfectly healthy and pristine till their sudden and rapid decline. And they used to produce a bigger frond than previous ones every time or every orher time, which allowed me dreaming of stately specimens in relatively near future. Alas, palmy gods have different plans from those of mortal growers....

[The Palm Nut]

That really sucks, any idea the cause? 

[Phoenikakias]

  On 8/29/2023 at 2:39 AM, The Palm Nut said:

That really sucks, any idea the cause? 

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Pythium. Garden's soil is full of Pythium and Rhizoctonia.