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Palm talk and depression


Rickybobby

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You're not alone, buddy. I can relate to every bit of this except I don't live in Canada and I have a dog instead of reef tanks and parrots. 

 

Good vibes, brother. 

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Chin up bud from a fellow Canadian. I too love my fish, probably my first passion. However I’ve always specialized in African cichlids, probably too much.   
 

I think this forum is unique in the level of mutual respect and enthusiasm for one another. Glad you’re in a better place. I’ll make sure to have a “Rye and Coke” in your honor (if that’s appropriate!)  if not it will have to be a homemade “Double Double” - no Timmy’s this way  

 

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Good onya Rob, keep punching on mate. Strangely enough I also have a reef tank, I've just come back from the beach with an anemone and a starfish! Funny how so many on this forum have similar interests. I always find your posts interesting mate, the level of enthusiasm you have is infectious, you're a champ cobber . 

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2 hours ago, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

So sorry to hear of your pain.

So glad to hear you’re getting past it!

All the best if you want seeds just ask!

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Let's keep our forum fun and friendly.

Any data in this post is provided 'as is' and in no event shall I be liable for any damages, including, without limitation, damages resulting from accuracy or lack thereof, insult, or lost profits or revenue, claims by third parties or for other similar costs, or any special, incidental, or consequential damages arising out of my opinion or the use of this data. The accuracy or reliability of the data is not guaranteed or warranted in any way and I disclaim liability of any kind whatsoever, including, without limitation, liability for quality, performance, merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose arising out of the use, or inability to use my data. Other terms may apply.

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3 hours ago, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

Just want to say what a bright note it is to read of your improved state.  Thanks for sharing this.  So glad you are well and thriving (and so are your palms :) !

 

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Palms saved my life. I don’t want to tell a long story but for a lot of us palms are our life line to a happy life

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4 minutes ago, John hovancsek said:

Palms saved my life. I don’t want to tell a long story but for a lot of us palms are our life line to a happy life

Hear, hear. In a world where everything and everyone are judged and criticized, palms are non-judgmental and offer beauty.

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Meg

Palms of Victory I shall wear

Cape Coral (It's Just Paradise)
Florida
Zone 10A on the Isabelle Canal
Elevation: 15 feet

I'd like to be under the sea in an octopus' garden in the shade.

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In my case it is exactly the opposite: The palm trees (not PalmTalk!) hold me tight in a depression from which I cannot escape because of them. If I hadn't had any palm trees at home, I would have fled to Sweden or Belarus already since March of last year because those seem to be the only countries in Europe where there doesn't dominate any political corona madness :sick: like here in Germany :violin: and its neighboring countries.

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My photos at flickr: flickr.com/photos/palmeir/albums

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Rickbobby;

  I met my first girlfriend that I truly loved  at college in Santa Barbara, CA.  The municipal courthouse there has many beautiful palms illuminated at night.   A restaurant dinner and walk around this romantic vista was one of our first dates.    Now, my go-to joke is that "The girl didn't last, but the palms did".    :mrlooney:

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San Francisco, California

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On the night of December 31st, New Year's Eve, I was questioned by the police in Heidelberg because I had been outside without permission between 8 p.m. and 5 a.m. That is Germany since 2020, I have never lived in such a non-free state since 1945 (and I even visited the Soviet Union under Brezhnev in 1968 and 1970).

755023138_TWagner2020-12-31P1050604.thumb.jpg.4c8f1c7d5bc5afd036f9b0089ea7edb9.jpg

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My photos at flickr: flickr.com/photos/palmeir/albums

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1 hour ago, Pal Meir said:

In my case it is exactly the opposite: The palm trees (not PalmTalk!) hold me tight in a depression from which I cannot escape because of them. If I hadn't had any palm trees at home, I would have fled to Sweden or Belarus already since March of last year because those seem to be the only countries in Europe where there doesn't dominate any political corona madness :sick: like here in Germany :violin: and its neighboring countries.

I once tried to get away from it all and moved up to Anchorage Alaska, leaving all of my palms (potted at the time) behind. About 2 weeks into my time there, I found a nursery with a greenhouse full of Cycas revoluta and other "house plants", including palms which I could grow outside at home. It was both refreshing to visit this nursery and depressing at the same time. I didn't stay in Alaska for long.

Covid will soon be just a bad memory.

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Fellow reefer and African cichlid tank owner here!

Keep on truckin', dude!

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Ben Rogers

On the border of Concord & Clayton in the East Bay hills - Elev 387 ft 37.95 °N, 121.94 °W

My back yard weather station: http://www.wunderground.com/cgi-bin/findweather/hdfForecast?query=37.954%2C-121.945&sp=KCACONCO37

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Hooray for mbunas!

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Let's keep our forum fun and friendly.

Any data in this post is provided 'as is' and in no event shall I be liable for any damages, including, without limitation, damages resulting from accuracy or lack thereof, insult, or lost profits or revenue, claims by third parties or for other similar costs, or any special, incidental, or consequential damages arising out of my opinion or the use of this data. The accuracy or reliability of the data is not guaranteed or warranted in any way and I disclaim liability of any kind whatsoever, including, without limitation, liability for quality, performance, merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose arising out of the use, or inability to use my data. Other terms may apply.

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@Rickybobby, Congrats on the new job! Like others have said, keep on keeping on! B)

Drop a link to your YouTube channel so I could subscribe :greenthumb:

-James

Hesperia,Southern CA (High Desert area). Zone 8b

Elevation; about 3600 ft.

Lowest temp. I can expect each year 19/20*f lowest since I've been growing palms *13(2007) Hottest temp. Each year *106

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this is Rickybobbys youtube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/EhTeamRacing/videos

i have not been able to give you a thumbs up lately because i am locked out of my gmail

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On 2/13/2021 at 9:53 PM, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

Thank you for Sharing Rob, ever since the pandemic crisis started here on the island of Aruba I too went into sever depression, and that's when I got into palms, but planting them from seed, and witnessing their miracles every day brought me back slowly and now I'm on my way to becoming a palm enthusiast.

Stay strong!

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@subsonicdrone, thanks :greenthumb:

Hesperia,Southern CA (High Desert area). Zone 8b

Elevation; about 3600 ft.

Lowest temp. I can expect each year 19/20*f lowest since I've been growing palms *13(2007) Hottest temp. Each year *106

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  • 4 months later...

I had the same difficult situation as you, and I am also obsessed with palms. I was pretty depressed after  I have lost my job. I was unemployed for an extended period, and I spent all my money. I was in a challenging situation. After a long time, I got a job, and I was financially stable, but my anxiety and depression was the main problem. I searched for a solution to deal with my situation, and I found out a plant named deleted (Mod Edit) that has a relaxing and calming effect. You could find it on deleted (Mod Edit). After a month of using it, I quit my depressive mood, and now I am finally happy, and I live my life like I didn't before.

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On 2/14/2021 at 9:53 AM, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

Good on you Rob. You’ve demonstrated resilience in life. Some of us get dealt some not so good cards, but we have to play the hand we’ve been dealt. You’ve taken a potentially debilitating negative and created a positive from it all. Your life will be better for it too. Well done.

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Millbrook, "Kinjarling" Noongar word meaning "Place of Rain", Rainbow Coast, Western Australia 35S. Warm temperate. Csb Koeppen Climate classification. Cool nights all year round.

 

 

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Palms are the greatest antidepressants ever. Watching something grow and take shape that you planted is very therapeutic and rewarding. 

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On 2/13/2021 at 5:53 PM, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

Thanks for having the courage to say that. This past year was a rollercoaster of elation through my palms and landscape/garden work at my new house and dives into depression where everything seemed pointless. This forum was very helpful to keep me positive and engaged with life. Stay strong.

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On 7/7/2021 at 8:18 PM, ExperimentalGrower said:

Thanks for having the courage to say that. This past year was a rollercoaster of elation through my palms and landscape/garden work at my new house and dives into depression where everything seemed pointless. This forum was very helpful to keep me positive and engaged with life. Stay strong.

Totally agree 

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Old post but thanks everyone. I’m a little heavier but doing well. Palms doing well new baby on the way this october. Reef tank doing well YouTube channel is modest but a good learning experience for everyone. Thank you again 

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Thank you for sharing! I know just how you feel. I suffer from anxiety, panic attacks, and occasionally depression. Tending to my plants, watching them develop and thrive, and researching about them is truly my therapy. :greenthumb:

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Naples (inland), FL - technically 10a but more like 9b in the winter :hmm:

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  • 2 years later...

Hey, I totally get what you're saying. Dealing with depression can be really tough, and it's awesome that you found solace. Sometimes finding joy in simple things can make a big difference. Have you considered reaching out to a therapist or counselor? They can provide valuable support and guidance as you navigate your mental health journey.

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 When I found out my husband had taken off with my new car, left 7 employees unpaid and given me a 7 figure sexually acquired debt,  lost my huge old house that I had spent 6 years restoring, left my 1 acre of garden that I created out of rock hard clay and realised I would be stuck in Queensland, a place I still detest, possibly forever,  I went into a black depression that lasted 3 years. I found a book on palms, a plant I always loved and thought well as I am stuck in a hot climate I can grow some palms. They saved my life of this I am certain.  I still sink into dark periods now and then but I am forced to get of my arse to feed the dogs and cats, tend to my birds and water my million and one pot plants as well creating a new garden from scratch since I moved house.  Just keep busy looking after the things you love.

Peachy

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I came. I saw. I purchased

 

 

27.35 south.

Warm subtropical, with occasional frosts.

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1 hour ago, peachy said:

 When I found out my husband had taken off with my new car, left 7 employees unpaid and given me a 7 figure sexually acquired debt,  lost my huge old house that I had spent 6 years restoring, left my 1 acre of garden that I created out of rock hard clay and realised I would be stuck in Queensland, a place I still detest, possibly forever,  I went into a black depression that lasted 3 years. I found a book on palms, a plant I always loved and thought well as I am stuck in a hot climate I can grow some palms. They saved my life of this I am certain.  I still sink into dark periods now and then but I am forced to get of my arse to feed the dogs and cats, tend to my birds and water my million and one pot plants as well creating a new garden from scratch since I moved house.  Just keep busy looking after the things you love.

Peachy

Hear, hear. Pets and palms don’t judge or turn on you and give you a reason to get up each day.

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Meg

Palms of Victory I shall wear

Cape Coral (It's Just Paradise)
Florida
Zone 10A on the Isabelle Canal
Elevation: 15 feet

I'd like to be under the sea in an octopus' garden in the shade.

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3 hours ago, PalmatierMeg said:

Hear, hear. Pets and palms don’t judge or turn on you and give you a reason to get up each day.

Oh I don't know about that...our black kitty Ninja will stomp off and sulk if I eat a piece of cheese and fail to give her a little chunk.  :P

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I think many plant people have these issues and our plants are honest with us: give us what we need or we die.  Its easy to understand, and not hold it against them, but also gives meaning to our own lives.  People are more difficult, and as the world gets crazier and closer than ever places like this play roles no one intended but are very vital.  Covid had little effect on me due to a dark time in my life that started before it, but now things are "normal"-and they so are not.  I climbed back out into a still crazy world and bad anxiety still. I have rebuilt, but will carry that with me forever and palmtalk is a great way to feel a connection to something no matter where you are.  Its what got me from lurking to posting once i could interact again.  If you feel like something is off in your life dont wait until you can't reach out. Tell someone close if you have them (i didnt at the time), even this place of you have nowhere else. DM me too if you have no other way ill answer.  That goes for anyone on this forum who needs an ear by the way.

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My two cats and many palms remind me that whenever I think too highly of myself I still have feet of clay. I trip and fall - a lot.

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Meg

Palms of Victory I shall wear

Cape Coral (It's Just Paradise)
Florida
Zone 10A on the Isabelle Canal
Elevation: 15 feet

I'd like to be under the sea in an octopus' garden in the shade.

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I hear you! Back when I lived in Maryland, I was dealing with a lot of major life issues at once and turned to palms and banana trees as an outlet. It's not Canada, but the winter gets grey, dark, and dreary with all the deciduous trees bare, and the tropicals definitely did help.

 

Glad you got through it!! 😃

 

On 2/13/2021 at 8:53 PM, Rickybobby said:

When I first joined this forum I didn’t know because I was too far gone. But I was going through bad depression because of work. I was drinking heavily but also obsessed with palms. I was using palms and this forum as a way to feel better. I’m very thankful for that. And this. Iam doing amazing as I got a new job within the company. (Huge company) I’ve taken on reef tanks again. As I did as a youngster.  Thank you to everyone for your support. Thanks for the love. The YouTube support.   My palms are doing well indoors here in southern Ontario. I did loose a few seedlings this winter as I have been taking care of my family. My parrots and my reef tanks. But I do get some dm as people ask me for advice for indoor northern growing and it makes me feel great!! I know I’m not on a lot. But I just want to say thank you to everyone for helping me get through a hard time in my life !

rob

 

¡Oh, palmera! Tu eres como yo, extranjera en occidente, alejada de tu patria. 🌴

~Abderramán I 

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Keep ya chin up man! Palms and Reefing are 2 hobbies that require a TON of patience 😅 My tank crashed years ago, so it's just a FOWLR now with clowns. Reefing is a full time job.. at least palms don't need constant attention

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  • 2 weeks later...

Unfortunately, I did lose a few seedlings over the winter, but that's because I've been taking care of my family, parrots, and reef tanks. It warms my heart when I receive direct messages from people seeking advice on indoor northern growing. It makes me feel fantastic to be able to help!  I know I'm not as active as I'd like to be on this forum, but I genuinely want to express my gratitude to each and every one of you for helping me get through one of the hardest times in my life. Your kindness has been truly uplifting. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

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On 7/26/2023 at 6:53 AM, PalmatierMeg said:

Hear, hear. Pets and palms don’t judge or turn on you and give you a reason to get up each day.

Be the person your dog thinks you are !

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San Francisco, California

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  • 4 weeks later...

Just wanted to jump in and say - it's incredible how something like palms and a supportive community can really make a positive impact during tough times. Congrats on the new job and getting back into reef tanks - sounds like you're finding your balance again. Your journey is an inspiration to us all! On a personal note, I've also faced emotional struggles and anxiety. I actually came across some symptoms similar to what's described here: https://fherehab.com/anxiety/generalized-anxiety-disorder/ and realized seeking professional help was the best path forward. Despite trying various methods, I realized I needed professional help to navigate through it. It's essential to acknowledge when things become overwhelming.

Edited by BenSilver
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My garden and palms helped me a lot after my divorce 23 years enough time to grow a palm garden in fact it’s a great place the back of our minds to visit just don’t go to far back for too long I now live in peace in my garden I live for my garden and my garden lives for me palms are the chorus line in the garden 

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