33 replies to this topic

[calyptrocalyx&licuala freck]

This is one part of the year I really am not looking forward to, Esp Christmas Day
after losing a great man (My Dad March 08) I'm finding things alot harder than ever
So Dad this one's for you......... Love you and really miss you soo so much.
thanks to a special crowd of people from the board that contacted me
to let me know that I was in there thoughts...You guys rock.
R.I.P Mike Edwards (SNR)...... Love always Mike(Jnr)

Edited by calyptrocalyx&licuala freck, 10 December 2008 - 11:04 PM.

[_Wal]

I didn't know Mikey, here's to ya.

[BS Man about Palms]

Mikey- Keep on keepin on.

[bubba]

Mike,I lost my Dad in April 05. I feel your pain. It will get better.No one really understands till it happens to you.After a year, you will begin to feel much better and he will never leave you, as you will have him constantly in your dreams. Those who have not lost Dad's, hug them.

[simona]

Miss mine too...

[palmisland]

I wish my dad could have seen my garden. He'd have been impressed!

[calyptrocalyx&licuala freck]

Thanks so much guys, Palmtalk is one place that Has helped me out
even if I've slowed down in my postings, Just Love you guys all so much as
I said before this place Rocks, and that comes from the bottom of my
Heart....... reading the postings has made me cry, Thanks Once more to all
of you.
Biggest and Best Regards, Mikey

[palmmermaid]

I lost my Dad last December right after Christmas. It was very hard even though he had been sick for a while. He and Mom had been married for 60 years. Sometimes when I hear a song or am working with wood or in my garden, I remember him and tears still come. Christmas will be hard this year.

If your parents are still around, hug them and tell them all the things you have been meaning to say.

[Dypsisdean]

Mikey,

I can tell you are one of those tough Aussie characters and will persevere. But I know it is tough. Mine has been gone a while, and I still miss him. Be glad you had him as long as you did.

[_Keith]

There aren't a lot of times I just don't know what to write, but this is one. Persevere, and live every day to its fullest, as I am sure he would want you to.

Best I can do.

[Algirdas]

Mike,

The way I remember my father is by incorporating his memory into my everyday life. For example, my screen name is my dad’s first name. I also incorporate different facts about my father into my passwords. It’s been 11 years since my dad pasted and I have thought about him at least once a day regardless of how crazy life is at that moment in time because of the foregoing. I hope the best for you and your family.

[LJG]

Wow, you guys are getting me choked up. My Dad is still around but at 65 he drinks too much, has a failing liver, gets sick a lot and just does not take care of himself. I get mad at the old man, but when you guys put it like this.....

Mikey, sorry to hear man! I do not even want to imagine what the pain must be like bro.

[_Wal]

I'm feeling maudlin tonight, I lost my Dad when I was 18, he was 59. He fought in WW2 on the Kakoda trail and never ever got to see my wife, my kids and my grandkids and never got see my new passion of happiness with palms, messin' with you derros. Here's cheers to my old man and yours. Now who's gonna start a thread for the mums.

[Jeff Searle]

I'm feeling maudlin tonight, I lost my Dad when I was 18, he was 59. He fought in WW2 on the Kakoda trail and never ever got to see my wife, my kids and my grandkids and never got see my new passion of happiness with palms, messin' with you derros. Here's cheers to my old man and yours. Now who's gonna start a thread for the mums.

Wal,

I think it's a great idea to honor our moms ! And I will do so.


As alot of the locals know, my dad is still with us. He's 82 years old, comes to work here at the nursery 6 days a week, and I really, really dread the day when he goes. he's been a great, fair, and easy to get along with dad. He's slowing down, but I guess that's what happens when your in your eighties. I thank God for every day he's here with us.

Jeff

[bgl]

Mikey,

Thanks for starting this thread! And my thoughts are with you. My dad died in April 1996, a few months after we had moved to Hawaii. He lived in Sweden but spent 6 months every winter in southern Spain (Fuengirola), and I would typically only get to see him once a year (either in Spain or in Sweden). He outlived my mom by 17 years but had a "girl friend" for the last 16 years, or so. Something I can highly recommend for those of you who still have one or both of your parents still living is to start a "tradition" of doing something special with just ONE of your parents. (But obviously do it with both of them - just not at the same time!!). For the last 15 years or so, whenever I met my dad, I would take him out for lunch or dinner, just the two of us. Initially, his girlfriend probably wondered why she couldn't be included, but she quickly understood that our get-togethers were no threat to her, and accepted it. The conversations I had with my dad (even though they were certainly not "confidential" in any way - i.e. we didn't talk about anything that would have been a secret to his girlfriend) would never have taken place if it hadn't been for the fact that it was just the two of us. The dynamics are just very different when you're with someone and it's just the two of you, but I think most of us feel that we want to be "inclusive" and (for instance) have dinner with BOTH our parents. Based on my experience, big mistake! (Of course, the best thing is to do BOTH!).

Bo-Göran

Edit: needless to say, I would recommend this approach for any close relationship. If you have more than one sibiling, for instance, start a tradition of having lunch with each of them. Just the two of you (no spouses). But one at a time. And make it clear WHY you want to do this, because obviously whoever isn't the first one could get the wrong idea!

PS to Len - couldn't help but smile when I read your post. I'll be 65 next month. But I wasn't planning on getting old for a while. A long while...!

[LJG]

Bo, that is a figure of speech. A term of respect a son has for his father. The "Old man". Not saying 65 is old. I can tell you one thing Bo, you take very good care of yourself. My Dad does not. Which drives the family nuts.

PS to Len - couldn't help but smile when I read your post. I'll be 65 next month. But I wasn't planning on getting old for a while. A long while...!

[bgl]

Len,

I AM familiar with the expression "the old man"... And even though we have grown children, I've never heard them refer to me that way. But who knows what they call me when I'm not present...!

Bo-Göran

[_Wal]

An aussie band here called The Valentines had a pop song in the late 60s called "My old man's a groovy old man".

[John in Andalucia]

An aussie band here called The Valentines had a pop song in the late 60s called "My old man's a groovy old man".

Sounds like around the same time as Lonnie Donegan's, "My Old Man's a Dustman".

Oh, my old man's a dustman
He wears a dustman's hat
He wears cor blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat
He looks a proper narner
In his great big hob nailed boots
He's got such a job to pull 'em up
That he calls them daisy roots

I wouldn't refer to my Dad by any name that I wouldn't use to his face.

Mum, Dad and I live together in Spain. My Dad has had MS for over 25 years and is wheelchair-bound, hence at nearly 45 I am around to help out. I did my back in again, a couple of weeks ago when Mum went to the UK for a break, trying to pick him up off the floor. As my Mum says, "you're not Mike Tyson!" but I'm happy to be giving something in return. I didn't see either of them much when I was in my mid-20's to 30's and living in London, England. It feels good to be giving a few of those years back.

[Ray Tampa]

Mike,

My sincerest heartfelt condolences. This is a pain we will all feel sooner or later.

My dad is now 84 and mom is 79. I am aware that any day at this age could be their last. As far as I'm concerned, everyday from here on out is a gift and a blessing.

Ray

[Gileno Machado]

I feel sorry for you dear Mikey and the other friends who lost their parents recently too.
My dad had a real difficult time last year when he was diagnosed with a big cancerous tumor in his bladder, probably caused by his several decades of cigarette smoking (just like me btw...). He is 87 now (born in 1921) and he is a veteran of WWII (he was ready to go to the front in Italy and join the Brazilian Expeditionary Force when the war was over but he had served in the Marine Corp guarding our coastline against submarine operations). We took him to the best hospital in Brazil (São Paulo) where he had a monitored surgery and the lesion was totally destroyed and removed by an optical device and no metastasis were found ever since. We are very glad he was able to overcome the disease and now he is having a normal retirement life again, with Mom (who is 82 and also had heart problems, now using a pacemaker). We had to hire them a full time driver and a lady housekeeper as he had to quit driving and take long physiotherapy sessions. Now he is back to his old books and TV shows in their apartment by the sea. It is amazing how his mind still works so perfect at this advanced age...I guess his memory is far better than mine...and we all still benefit from his experience, love and advice...He never got used to computers though (unlike my Mom, who started playing with a laptop and discovered the world of the internet this year...). I'll give them a nice potted Lytocaryum weddelianum for Xmas as they both think it is the nicest palm I have at home...It is a blessing to have them around doing fine after so many difficult moments they've been through...

[Davidl]

Mikey I lost my father in 1999 and he was 82 and I still miss him. What comforts me is I'm sure where he is and I know I will see him again. Time will heal your hurt but your memory of him will be forever.

[oppalm]

Hang in there Mikey. It does get easier as the pain fades and the memories live on. I lost my dad in 1998 when he was just 62. That was 10 years ago and hardly a day goes by that I don't think about him and what he meant to me and our family.

[calyptrocalyx&licuala freck]

Hi Guys,
As I said before You guys are so thought full I'm so glad that I've talked to many
of you via PM and many can feel the same Pain I'm going through, Cheers to you all.
Regards Mikey

Edited by calyptrocalyx&licuala freck, 19 December 2008 - 06:49 PM.

[Cycadcenter]

I got the dreaded phone call this morning that my Dad passed away peacefully in his sleep this morning, Xmas Day in Australia.

I was so lucky to spend a week with him last month as we knew his days were numbers but it still doesn't help with the initial shock of the news.

The funeral is next week so I'm flying over on Friday, would you believe it Qantas had Frequent Flyer seats for the days I wanted to travel.

I miss him already

Bruce

[bgl]

Bruce,

So sorry to hear about your loss. I know you're grateful for the week you spent with him. And despite the occasion, I hope you'll have a good trip.

Bo-Göran

[calyptrocalyx&licuala freck]

Hi Bruce,
I'm so Sorry to hear that your Dad pasted away, At the moment there
maybe no bright side but keep on thinking of the good times you had,
have a safe trip, thinking of you and your Family at this Sad Time.
Best wishes....Mikey

Edited by calyptrocalyx&licuala freck, 26 December 2008 - 07:15 PM.

[palmmermaid]

Bruce,

Sorry to hear about your loss. I know it is hard. Yesterday marks a year since my Dad died and I still think about him often. But it does get better.

[DoomsDave]

Bruce and Mike:

So sad to hear, and, alas, welcome to the club.

My mother died in March of 2002.

You never forget, but the sharp pain of the loss gradually gives way to the occasional dull ache of remembrance. Once in a while, I'lll see, hear or smell something that reminds me of her. She was a rabid reader, I am, too.

Dad's 80, alive and kicking and remarried.

Guess I'd better get on up to Ohio and see him while I can . . . .

[_Keith]

My condolences , and thank you for reminding me how fortunate I am to still have both of my folks.

[yachtingone]

Mike, I feel your pain. I just lost my dad 74 years old last sunday morning. I had no idea it would be so painful. He died from altshiemers so it was a long process. He's in a better place now where he doesn't have to suffer any longer! He died on fathers day which I like very much. Rest in peace George Decker my dad. Regards, Randy Decker

[Palmgrover]

Last Wednesday marked the 25th anniversary of the passing of my father. To this day I still miss him very much. I learned so much from him and have so much to thank him for. A real hands on kind of guy who never had to call a professional for help around the house, he did it all.
Some of the things that I admire about him were, in the mid 70s he built a color TV from scratch ,well actually a kit but still pretty amazing.
In the 60s when I was a kid he worked on a project for General Dynamics of a rocket that go into space and deploy cargo from its storage compartment and then return to earth and land like a jet on a run way. At the time it was "Top Secret" now its known as the space shuttel...
Other projects he worked on were Mercury, Atlas ,Apollo and the tomahawk cruse missile.
I also got the gardening bug from him. We planted 200 avocado trees in our back yard and till he died we picked them all for years. Thats probably why I didn't like to eat avocados for years.
I just wish my daughter and wife could have met him. To have known him and love him as I do.

RIP
Ruel Von Weas
You will not be forgotten and you will always remain in my heart.
I love you Dad

[calyptrocalyx&licuala freck]

It's a Day that makes me so sad, it's only been 3 years today since my
Dad, Mike Edwards (Snr) passed away, the pain in my heart is still the
same and my eye's keep watering up so I thought I'd jump on palm talk to
say a special thanks to you guys, without you all life would suck...
I'm just lucky I have you all Cheers Guys and Girls
Here's to you Dad..Love you and miss you So So much
Mikey..

[Mandrew968]

My dad's my best friend and I can't imagine losing him, but we all are guaranteed death, eventually. I can't imagine how hard it must be, and my thoughts and emotions go out to you, down under. I am just glad that you have to go through this instead of him having lost you; I recently became a father, and it's always for the best when a son outlives his father. It's not easy, but it's how life should play out. I hope you had a great relationship with him and shared some special laughs with him. My dad's name is also Mike and I know the most important thing we have is our tendency to laugh more than anything else. I don't know if it gets easier... I know I sometimes REALLY miss my grandfather, and it can hit me anytime and any place. Go out in your garden and water--that always makes me feel better.